Bent

A woman, disturbed by evil in her spirit, was unable to look up to the Lord. She, bent in her ways, could only see the downward pits of the world. Jesus knew the evil power that held her low. With divine love and wisdom, He called to her and removed of the spiritual disorders. Through His healing hands she was able to rise up a to the will and love of God.

LUKE 13;10-16:

On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not straighten up at all. When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, “Woman, you are set free from your infirmity.” Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God.


I have spent too many years where I could only see the dirt. Filth smothered my memory. Much was brought on by others and others brought on by myself. I am not innocent of some of the causes of the torment. Circumstances caused consequences. Formed  with low self esteem, I gave permission to being bent. I can not give Satan all the credit. God gave me WILL. I used that will to stay in the muddy dirt of depression.

I chose to remain in depression because in that
state of mind  I recieved the attention I searched for. Pity parties were the norm. “Feel sorry for me.” “I am a victim.” “Look what happened to me.” This was the reality I deserved to visit but not to live in.


My blood pressure was out of control. I was sad. I was mad. I focused on me. My doctor put me on several types of antidepressants. I would quit them on my own. I had the right to be depressed and took full advantage of the attention it allowed. After all, people now listened to me when I said something. Right?Wrong.


What I got was being avoided. My thoughts and threats of suicide became a bad habit. Each time I had justified the feeling. With those feelings spoken, I was shunned, turned away from and left to handle these things alone. But, each time, God brought a prayer warrior into my life. I was not pacified by these people, instead prayed for and was guided to let these moments be between me and God. Me and God ..alone.


I was like the bent woman. Childhood misfortunes and adult circumstances left me hanging my head. Looking at the things that happened to me in abuses, my world weighed heavy on my shoulders. I could not find the way out of hopelessness and despair. My life spiraled downward. I couldn't straighten my life out. There was no expectation of hope. It actually happened, all hell broke loose. I was a mess.


What about the prayers? Did they go unheard? Not at all. When I couldn't listen, much less hear, God could. Could I lift my head if it weren't for a request made by each one of those people God placed in my path to pray? I doubt it. Each whisper was captured by the Lord. Every request was listened to. God was waiting for me to come to Him with the same.


When I felt that I came to the end of my rope, I cried out to God, “I can't take this anymore. Please God, help !" I forced each step as I walked into a prayer room with two women I had known from my prior church. I needed rescued. With the only ounce of strength I had left, I slowly surrendered to God. Crooked and bent, mangled and battered, prayer removed my hopelessness. I became encouraged. Daily progression is happening. Prayers continue and so does my growth to be straightened out and to rise.


I was this woman, disturbed by evil in my spirit, and was unable to look up to the Lord. Bent in my ways, I could only see the downward pits of the world. Jesus knew the evil power that held me down. Because of prayer and His divine love and wisdom, He called to me. When I listened and came to Him He removed my spiritual disorders and depression. Through His healing hands I am now able to rise to the will and love of God.


Through His will and love, I stand and see the splendor of Him. I no longer desire to be crippled , depressed and bent to the ways and the will of the world.  

Nan  Jones

 



We need to stay focused on the things that bring praises to God. Things which bring hope. When we can do this, we can be inspired to straighten out our lives. Be straightened in Him. Stand. Look up, look forward and see the the great possibilities of God.

Dear Lord, Help me to remain standing.