Thanksgiving arrives next week, and for the first time since she was 16 years old, my daughter won't be making the big family dinner. I have been blessed with wonderful children who grew up to be kind and generous adults, and they take care of a thousand things both big and small. My son and my daughter will be flying to another state for a memorial service for their cousin, Spencer.
It has been a rough year for my family. My stepfather, a true dad to me and a real grandpa to my children, died this summer after a long illness. My cousin Larry Dean fell from a tree and died unexpectedly in June. After helping my father through his last illness, my beautiful baby sister had a miscarriage. And now Spencer has gone from the earth.
The older I get, the more people seem to disappear. How little time we have, and how precious each moment feels. If only the healing could hasten, faster, faster.
My mother called today. She misses my Aunt Linda, who died mysteriously almost thirty years ago. My mother and I were estranged for a while, for a thousand reasons. Today she started out by talking about her manicure, her sparkly bright turquoise fingernails. My mother's bling includes remaking her wedding ring. She's going to join my stepdad's ring to hers, fuse them, and create a whole new ring to mark her new life alone. We had a quiet conversation about Aunt Linda, whom we both loved, and about the stunning sequence of sorrows that marked 2014. I realized as I hung up the phone that I have forgiven my mother for every mistake she ever made, and she, bless her heart, has forgiven me.
She did her best, you see. Whatever mistakes happened, she did her best. And life is too short for long grudges.
Submission by : Kiesa Kay 11-19-14