Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Happy Birthday to a New Kind of Love

We sang in the choir, 10,000 Reasons. Shivers of memory welled up in my eyes as I recalled the heavenly birthday of my mother in law.

And on that day when my strength is failing
The end draws near and my time has come
Soon my soul will sing your praise un-ending
10,000 years and there forever more

Sunday was Dolores' heavenly anniversary. Three years ago God took His precious child, my best friend, home. I sure miss her. I had the best mother in law anyone could ask for. God knew I needed someone like her in my life. He provided so graciously.

Today is my mother's 73rd birthday. Only she passed away when she was only 46. At 22 years old, I lost my mother to a hard battle of cancer.  Unfortunately I didn't have a friendship with her. We loved each others as much as we could.  And only that much. I wish I had had more opportunity to build a forgiving relationship with her. I long to have been her friend. 

But ya know what? As strange as it may sound, I have that. I am learning to forgive and love the woman who gave birth to me. Learning more and more about how hurting people hurt people, has freed her of responsibility that I placed on her. Forgiveness has broken shackles that I placed around her. It also released me. I wish for my mother an eternity of forgiveness and happiness. I pray that God allows her to feel joy and peace in that.

One day I will come face to face with both of these ladies. I want to wrap my arms around my mother first and get a hug like we have never felt.  I want my mother to look into my eyes and let her see what love from me actually looks and feels like. Second, I will run to Dolores and thank her for all the love she taught and shared with me.  Then..the  two... no...three of us can walk off to the heavenly sunset as mother and daughter and friends. Finally being the family God had intended for us  to be in the first place.

I love my mother(s). It feels good to know it.

Thank You Heavenly Father for showing me the agape love I need to share with others. You give so freely. May I give it back in return.

Are you holding someone captive in your unforgiveness? Do you want a relationship to heal like you could never imagine? I pray you take it to our Heavenly Father and let Him reveal to you the areas that need mending. God bless you as you seek and find Him for the answers.


  1. Beautifully written. I love you write with abandonment and let all the pain and loss and joy just flow from you.
    I know your mother, NO, MOTHERS are extremely proud of you.
    And on that day, should you see them again before us, Please thank your mother for giving you to all of us, and PLEASE hug and thank Bambi for keeping you with us.
    Love you !

  2. Gina, If I can't be honest...then I can't show the Love of God in a real way. Isn't He so merciful and giving? If I can't give just a tiny bit back to Him... then what am I here for?
    Thank you for your kind words. I will give Bambi a "gigantinormous" hug for you. My preasure.
    As for my mother(s) being proud ? Well, as long as they are happy with Jesus in Heaven...that is what matters. But,I wouldn't mind a pat on the back from my mom. Can I cry now?
    I love you Gina... so much.

  3. Amazing writing! Thanks for being transparent and allowing us a peek into your soul so we can see how Jesus is working in your life. What a testimony to His goodness and faithfulness!

  4. Dito on the "well written" God bless and keep you as you heal and share!!